What's your motivation?

While still suffering from the aches and pains of my third dan blackbelt exam four days ago, but also still on a bit of a buzz, I thought I'd write this down so I can look back and remember this important stage in my personal development.

I did my second with my son and now my third with my daughter, having sworn never again. But we knuckled down and got on with it. And I'm so glad we saw it through. It is a meaningful connection I will always share with my kids.

This grading had additional requirements and I was warned I may have to give a motivational talk to the class. Being someone who has always hated speaking in front of an audience, I was quite relieved that moment never came. But seeing as I had got it relatively straight in my head what I wanted to say, I'm going to say it here now instead.

Over ten years ago, I had a nasty chest infection that meant I couldn't do any fitness at all. Even getting out of bed to look after my children was a struggle. It affected me mentally as well as physically, and I vowed then that when I was well enough I would work to make myself as strong mentally and physically as I could so I could deal with whatever life had in store for me.

So in a way it did me a favour, because it gave me the motivation to start kickboxing and a fresh perspective on life - how life is precious, how we often take things for granted and how we don't always do the things we want to because we aren't brave enough.

So I started thinking about what I wanted out of life and what was important to me, and I started being braver.

And in the same year I became a blackbelt, I launched my own company Tamsin Stuart Art. Five years later I am taking my third dan and I am a professional artist. People buy my art and pay me to paint. I am working hard to make my dreams a reality because life is too short not to.

In everything I do, I go for it. I have that sense of urgency that I want to get the most out of every day and make it count. I haven't got time for half measures. Partly because when my mental and physical health were under attack I went to a dark place and I am determined I don't want to go back there. But also because if something is worth doing, it's worth doing properly, with your maximum effort and with as much passion as you can muster.

So if there's something you love doing, keep doing it as much as possible at every opportunity with your maximum effort and see where it takes you. Make the most out of life while you can. Because a time may come when that choice is taken away.

The moral of my story of how I got started is train like you're fighting for your life, because ultimately you are. One day the worst may happen and you may need to defend yourself or a loved one. But principally, because every single time you train you are investing in your mental and physical strength, fitness and wellbeing. And that has got to be worth your maximum effort and a whole heap of passion.

I stand with Lineker!

So I live in Cheltenham and if you mention Cheltenham to anyone anywhere in the world the town is synonymous with horseracing.

Being a rather opinionated person who is passionate about animal welfare, I always have the urge at this time of the year to start gobbing off about how cruel the Festival is and how horses will die for our entertainment.

This year I am taking a different tact. I am going silent instead. Not because I don't care any more. Privately I will still be feeling the same sadness, but publicly I will be conducting myself in a more measured way.

There's a lot in this world I don't agree with and working myself up into a frenzy on social media and getting into heated debates about it serves no purpose.

Cheltenham is the place to be for a great day at the races for the majority of people in the same way that Crufts is on right now and people will continue to breed dogs as I cry for the hundreds and thousands of unwanted pets that fill the rescue centres to the brim and are being euthanised in the pounds for no good reason.

I have my beliefs and I stand by them. And I will live my life true to them and with a clear conscience, and my art will be driven by them. So I intend to put all my time and energy into that rather than getting caught up in time-consuming arguments with people who I will always be at odds with and potentially offending those who don't think the same way as me.

Everyone is free to make their own choices about life and I respect that. But having an opinion and being passionate about it is life-affirming. And freedom of expression is everything, especially in art. And so #istandwithlineker

Usually I post my painting Jump in March. It is very special to me for many reasons and still hangs in our kitchen, colour co-ordinated with our breakfast bar stools, and always will.

But instead Wild Horses will be on my social media for the whole of next week, with no words or explanation, in tribute for the lives that will be lost and those that are lived freely and fully. And I will hold my tongue and you must come to your own conclusions.

Growing older but not necessarily wiser

So, I disabled the blog section on my website for a while. You probably didn't even notice. Don't blame you to be fair.

I was, and still am, quite sceptical about who actually has the time to read anyone's blog. I don't, I know that much.

So why anyone would take time out of their day to read mine I would often ask myself, as I looked at the long list of jobs I had to do for my art business that didn't involve painting (which is obviously the only thing I actually want to be doing)

It was quite interesting for me to reread old posts from the early part of my journey and reminisce. Some bits made me cringe, a lot in fact. And they have been deleted. But some made me feel quite proud that I had tried to put what I was feeling at the time into words. Pretty much most of it still stands and is just as relevant and so I have left it where it is.

Next to painting, the other bit I love most about being a professional artist is chatting to people about art and how it fits into their lives, my life, what excites us, motivates us, moves us. And that can be in the setting of a market, a village hall exhibition, a gallery, down the pub, in the supermarket, or online.

And so, I have decided to resurrect my blog. Can't promise how often I'll post because every post means another painting I haven't started yet. But, even if it's just ramblings for me to look back on in a few years' time, that's good enough for me.

I don't have any insightful pearls of wisdom, I am well aware of that. But if talking about my experience and sharing what I have learned so far as an artist is of any interest to anyone, I will happily spout on all day given the chance.

(Plus, I went to my first business networking meeting since lockdown last week, and apparently it's good to have a blog on your website)

Anyway, if you've bothered yourself to drop by, thank you. And if you haven't, I understand why. And now the urge to get my paints out is strong, so I'm off!